Its been almost a week since the funeral and for 4 of the
last 6 days my mother-in-law has been here at my house. She was
married for 62 years and now she is floundering.
She suffers from dementia and has absolutely no short term memory.
One sister-in-law has remained here while her family returned to
Alabama.
Sundowners is the name given to a condition that manifests itself
in the elderly with a fear of the night, or a fear of being out
of their own surroundings when night falls.
Night terrors well thats kind of easy to imagine.
The conversations go like this:
Wheres
Bud?
Hes gone mom.
What do you mean hes gone?
He died Mom
HE DID?
When did he die?
Was I there?
When was the funeral?
Insert light sobbing
Whose house is this?
Yes, but where do we live?
Whos going to sleep with me tonight? Im afraid. I cant
sleep alone.
Wheres Bud?
Insert answers
Repeat
Repeat
Repeat
Every 2 minutes, Repeat.
One bit of relief is in the knowing that the grief is so temporary,
since the discovery that her husband is dead is new every couple
of minutes.
Then she forgets
.
Shortly before he died Bud told one of the daughters that he was
being kept up all night with her frantic questions and fears.
I think she wore him out.
The daughters are working frantically to place her in a home, and
it just might work out that she can get a bed in a converted mansion
that is less than a mile from our house.
The transition to the new position is starting to take form and I
have been accepted with a great deal of enthusiasm.
Ive moved a computer to the new place and have taken up temporary
digs until the official office moving day of February 1.
In order to keep up with the other staff members, Ive become
a new Palmaholic with my Tungston Palm. Ive already got it
stuffed with some really nice wedding pictures.
Oh yeah, and the scrabble game, Im using that to learn the
shorthand thing. Besides, anyone who knows me knows that I cant
spell for s*)# and its a short course in spelling, right?
Manager's meeting? You want me to go to LA for a week in February?
NSR looks at thermometer this morning - 8 degrees F (-13C)
Sure, I can handle that.